7) Whoever loses their life

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Then Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me. For whoever wants to save their life will lose it, but whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? (Matthew 16:24-26)

A commonly used epitaph today is expressed something like: “they lived life to the full"! Whenever I read this bible passage I think of an alternative Christian epitaph: “they lost life to the full”! This is simply a comparative reflection according to these words of Jesus. Here He maintains that this is the best way to actually live life to the full.

This teaching marks a change of direction in the ministry of Jesus. He knew he would soon face crucifixion and began to explain this to his disciples. But, as we have seen, this was too much for Peter. He believed the standard Jewish view that the Messiah would be a conqueror and deliver Israel from the Roman rule. The idea of dying on a cross was a stumbling-block to him even though Jesus also went on to predict His resurrection.

termination

I fear that the message of this passage, namely that spiritual life only comes through losing self, is rejected by many people in the same way that Peter rejected it. Instead, the message preached is about what Jesus will do for you to benefit you, rather than what Jesus will do to you through the cross. It’s a message of self-interest rather than self-termination. It focuses on questions such as: “What can Jesus do for me? What can the church do for me?” But what Jesus taught was the complete opposite:

whoever loses their life for me will find it. What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul?

There is a play on words in the Greek text here. The word ‘life’ and ‘soul’ are the same. The life Jesus is referring to is the life of the real person you are: the person on the inside – the soul. Our present society emphasises the body but Jesus here wants us to focus on the life of the soul.

It is not surprising in a secular society that people crave a beautiful body and seek out experiences of physical pleasure. But Jesus teaches that joy in life comes not from self-indulgence but self-denial:

Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.

The secular media sells us the idea that fulfilment comes through the body. But this produces such frustration and unhappiness in people: we have millions of people expressing dissatisfaction with their body shape or size or looks because they have swallowed this idea that the body is all we are. But we are so much more – we are soul: spirit, mind, personality, character, heart!

servant

So how do we take up our cross, die to self, and lose our life for Jesus. The simple answer is by dedicating our lives to the benefit of others before our own interests. Jesus taught it in the simple saying:

It is more blessed to give than to receive (Acts 20:35)

A passage in Romans 12 spells that out in more detail. In it, Paul teaches us how to live as Christians and, significantly, there is no mention of self-interest at all. Here are summary snippets of his advice:

Love – Be devoted to one another – Honour one another above yourselves – Serve the Lord – Share with the Lord’s people – Practise hospitality – Live in harmony with one another – Associate with people of low position – Do not be conceited.

In Philippians this principle is laid out. In this passage we are exhorted to be like Jesus the Suffering Servant (Isaiah 52:13-):

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant (Philippians 2:3-7)

Jesus was asking of us nothing more than He had practised Himself. Taking up our cross is the end of selfish ambition. Conceit gives way to loving respect for others. The cross means we make ourselves nothing.

release

Surprisingly, that’s the simple answer. The more complicated answer as to how we take up our cross and die to self is that it is also a very personal journey. If you live in tune with the Holy Spirit, He will indicate ways in which you can effectively die to self by practising self-denial. These ways will be different for each of us. I find my conscience in the Holy Spirit won’t allow me to do many things; these are things which are not morally wrong or sinful: they are my personal connections to the self-life. This is actually very positive: the Holy Spirit is showing how to break free from the stranglehold of self which stops us finding the real life which Jesus promised. An illustration will help.

It is important to understand that dying to self is not simply obeying the Ten Commandments and living a good life. We see this when Jesus met a young man who was a very nice, good-living person. He asked Jesus how he could find the eternal life Jesus kept talking about. Jesus told him first of all to keep the commandments which he said he did. Let’s understand that being a good-living person and keeping the Ten Commandments is just a start for the Christian.

So, Jesus looked beyond the good-life of this young man and into his inmost soul and saw the self-interest which strangled him, preventing him from being liberated into true life. Jesus responded:

Jesus looked at him and loved him. ‘One thing you lack,’ he said. ‘Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.’’. (Mark 10:21)

It was the man’s wealth that his ‘self’ held onto. He went away very sad as he wasn’t prepared to deny himself, die to self and lose his life – Jesus was being too extreme for him.

chosen

I’m not sure how you would summarise the purpose of life. Well, I summarise it in this very simple way: this life is an audition for the life to come. As Jesus said:

For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father’s glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what they have done. (Matthew 16:27)

Our actions in life show what we really live for. By the grace of the Holy Spirit, I seek to live my life, not for what I can personally gain in this world, but to demonstrate by my life choices and actions that I can be rewarded in the life to come. I am learning to hold on lightly to everything I possess. What I have is merely a means to live a life devoid of self and fully committed to Jesus. When I die, this world will be gone, and all that I will be left with will be my soul. God will judge what kind of reward I deserve. I take this very seriously.

In Matthew 22, Jesus also refers to this important thing. Jesus tells the parable about invitations to a wedding and concludes with the famous phrase:

many are invited, but few are chosen. (Matthew 22:14)

I imagine a lot of people would like it rather to be: ‘all are invited and many are chosen’.
However, we can introduce the word ‘all’ if we also use the words from John’s Gospel where it says that God loved the world. Then we get: 'All are loved, many are invited, but few are chosen'.

So, although God loves us all, not all are invited to follow Jesus. For instance, in British society, church attendance averages around 5% of the population. But how many are chosen by God is a very deep mystery. Clearly no human being can decide whom God chooses and who is rejected. But the important point is our part in the decision. Our choices in life are an important part of confirming that God has accepted us in Christ. As Peter wrote:

Therefore, my brothers and sisters, make every effort to confirm your calling and election. (2 Peter 1:10)

discipline

The command to ‘deny themselves and take up their cross’ demonstrates the need for self-control as a personal virtue. In the past, when life was much tougher, self-control and denying one’s personal wishes was not only a virtue but a necessity. Without hard work there would be no food for the winter. By contrast, in a modern industrialised welfare society it is possible to eat without even having to work. It means that self-control is something we have to concentrate on practising. At times it is good to train the self into self-control by denying it what it might crave.

Paul teaches that self-control or self-discipline is a mark of wholeness which the Holy Spirit creates in us:

For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline (2 Timothy 1:7)

As we have remarked elsewhere, self-control is part of the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:23). It is also a practice which marks out those in leadership:

Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled (1 Timothy 3:2)

Finally, it is a quality which the grace of God works in us too:

For the grace of God has appeared that offers salvation to all people. It teaches us to say ‘No’ to ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright and godly lives in this present age, while we wait for the blessed hope – the appearing of the glory of our great God and Saviour, Jesus Christ, (Titus 2:11-13)

sacrifice

Probably the ultimate expression of losing life for Christ’s sake is in martyrdom. This would not be something we would actively seek (although there have been Christians in the past who have deliberately put themselves in harm’s way, ignoring all fears, that they might pay the ultimate price).

During the conflict with ISIS in the Levant a few years ago, I was sent a photo by Canon Andrew White, lately of Iraq. It showed graphically what it meant to make the ultimate submission of dying to self for Jesus in the 21^st century. It was a picture I did not show to anyone because it is both horrific and humbling at the same time. It shows a family of 8, including the children, who have been executed by a single shot, one at a time, in their own lounge. They were killed solely for refusing to deny Jesus – shown by a most poignant part of the scene – the family bible on the settee besides their bodies.

That is indeed the most extreme way in which Jesus calls us to lose life in order to gain our souls for eternal life. I am totally humbled by their genuine faith. It made me realise, that I have absolutely nothing to complain about, in the small ways in which Jesus calls me to deny myself and take up my cross. I pray that we all remain as faithful to Jesus and His word as they were.